Dallas Clark

DiamondBacks were led to their 13 point victory by a 25 point effort from Dallas Clark, who got by the Houston Texans defense for 80 receiving yards and 1 receiving TD. With this performance, Clark was the number 1 ranked tight end for week 1. They also got help from a 19 point effort from Greg Jennings, who got by the Philadelphia Eagles defense for 82 receiving yards and 1 receiving TD.

"We proved we're the better team," DiamondBacks coach Byron Crabb said.

Virginia Gentlemen were helped out in a losing cause by a 32 point effort from Jay Cutler, who tore apart the Detroit Lions defense for 372 passing yards and 2 passing TDs in addition to 22 rushing yards. With this performance, Cutler was the number 2 ranked quarterback for week 1. They also got help from a 18 point effort from LeSean McCoy, who snuck past the Green Bay Packers defense for 35 rushing yards and 1 rushing TD in addition to 47 receiving yards.

" It's been a great ride," Virginia Gentlemen coach Hank Glospie said.

Causing further embarrassment, Virginia Gentlemen could have scored 124 points and earned the win with their best lineup, but Hank Glospie left key players like Wes Welker and his corresponding 26 points on the bench.

This brings the record for DiamondBacks to 1-0, and drops Virginia Gentlemen to a record of 0-1.

Coming up in week 2, DiamondBacks are at the 1-0 Grove Rats, where Grove Rats are an early 1.1-point underdog, while the 0-1 Who Dats are at Virginia Gentlemen, where Virginia Gentlemen are an early 16.8-point favorite.

Rashard Mendenhall

Grove Rats were led to their 23 point victory by a 25 point effort from Rashard Mendenhall, who beat the Atlanta Falcons defense for 120 rushing yards and 1 rushing TD in addition to 15 receiving yards. With this performance, Mendenhall was the number 5 ranked running back for week 1. They also got help from a 18 point effort from Antonio Gates, who got by the Kansas City Chiefs defense for 76 receiving yards and 1 receiving TD.

"You dream about this as a kid," Grove Rats coach Randy Gattis said.

Who Dats were helped out in a losing cause by a 22 point effort from Philip Rivers, who got by the Kansas City Chiefs defense for 298 passing yards and 2 passing TDs in addition to 5 rushing yards. They also got help from a 13 point effort from Larry Fitzgerald, who snuck past the St. Louis Rams defense for 43 receiving yards and 1 receiving TD.

"They out-coached us," Who Dats coach Gary Craft said.

Compounding the issue, Who Dats could have scored 111 points and earned the win with their best lineup, but Gary Craft left key players like Eli Manning and his corresponding 25 points on the bench.

Grove Rats took advantage of their schedule this week, as their point total would have gone for a loss against 7 out of 8 other potential opponents in week 1.

This brings the record for Grove Rats to 1-0, and drops Who Dats to a record of 0-1.

Coming up in week 2, the 1-0 DiamondBacks are at Grove Rats, where Grove Rats are an early 1.1-point underdog, while Who Dats are at the 0-1 Virginia Gentlemen, where Virginia Gentlemen are an early 16.8-point favorite.

Chad Ochocinco

Handscraped Divas were led to their 47 point victory by a 37 point effort from Chad Ochocinco, who beat the New England Patriots defense for 159 receiving yards and 1 receiving TD. With this performance, Ochocinco was the number 5 ranked overall fantasy scorer for week 1. They also got help from a 29 point effort from Hakeem Nicks, who got by the Carolina Panthers defense for 75 receiving yards and 3 receiving TDs.

"You dream about this as a kid," Handscraped Divas coach Russ Marks said.

Moose Knuckles were helped out in a losing cause by a 22 point effort from Reggie Wayne, who got by the Houston Texans defense for 99 receiving yards and 1 receiving TD. They also got help from a 12 point effort from Brett Favre, who snuck past the New Orleans Saints defense for 171 passing yards and 1 passing TD.

"We'll just have to put this loss behind us," Moose Knuckles coach Tim Herbst said.

This brings the record for Handscraped Divas to 1-0, and drops Moose Knuckles to a record of 0-1.

Coming up in week 2, the 1-0 SHOWTIME are at Moose Knuckles, where Moose Knuckles are an early 6.1-point underdog, while Handscraped Divas are at the 1-0 RoadKill Gang, where RoadKill Gang are an early 4-point favorite.

Peyton Manning

RoadKill Gang were led to their 37 point victory by a 37 point effort from Peyton Manning, who tore apart the Houston Texans defense for 433 passing yards and 3 passing TDs. With this performance, Manning was the number 4 ranked overall fantasy scorer for week 1. They also got help from a 34 point effort from Miles Austin, who beat the Washington Redskins defense for 146 receiving yards and 1 receiving TD.

"This was a confidence booster," RoadKill Gang coach Danny Bauer said.

Hairy Polis were helped out in a losing cause by a 28 point effort from Roddy White, who beat the Pittsburgh Steelers defense for 111 receiving yards. With this performance, White was the number 5 ranked wide receiver for week 1. They also got help from a 18 point effort from Tony Romo, who got by the Washington Redskins defense for 282 passing yards and 1 passing TD.

"We didn't get the big breaks today," Hairy Polis coach Robert Recker said.

This brings the record for RoadKill Gang to 1-0, and drops Hairy Polis to a record of 0-1.

Coming up in week 2, the 0-1 Da Mudbugz are at Hairy Polis, where Hairy Polis are an early 48.5-point favorite, while the 1-0 Handscraped Divas are at RoadKill Gang, where RoadKill Gang are an early 4-point favorite.

Arian Foster

SHOWTIME were led to their 52 point victory by a 50 point effort from Arian Foster, who tore apart the Indianapolis Colts defense for 231 rushing yards and 3 rushing TDs in addition to 7 receiving yards. With this performance, Foster was the number 1 ranked overall fantasy scorer for week 1. In addition, Foster entered the BUBBA Fantasy Football League Hall Of Fame with this performance as the 10th-ranked individual weekly player score in league history. They also got help from a 24 point effort from Tom Brady, who got by the Cincinnati Bengals defense for 258 passing yards and 3 passing TDs.

"We're glad to get out of here with the 'W'," SHOWTIME coach Eddie Murillo said.

Da Mudbugz were helped out in a losing cause by a 34 point effort from Chris Johnson, who beat the Oakland Raiders defense for 142 rushing yards and 2 rushing TDs in addition to 8 receiving yards. With this performance, Johnson was the number 3 ranked running back for week 1. They also got help from a 12 point effort from Cedric Benson, who snuck past the New England Patriots defense for 43 rushing yards and 1 rushing TD in addition to 11 receiving yards.

"The best team won today," Da Mudbugz coach Richard Sumlin said.

This brings the record for SHOWTIME to 1-0, and drops Da Mudbugz to a record of 0-1.

Coming up in week 2, SHOWTIME are at the 0-1 Moose Knuckles, where Moose Knuckles are an early 6.1-point underdog, while Da Mudbugz are at the 0-1 Hairy Polis, where Hairy Polis are an early 48.5-point favorite.